From Soup To NUTS!

For years…and years…and YEARS … bloated, bloviating white men MANdated that only white men were smart enough, educated enough, wise enough, to determine what their country would permit its citizens to do, and not do. When a small semblance of sanity reared its conscious head and the law of the land granted the vote to men of color, the bloated bloviaters decided that, in order to maintain their control of all things American, they would have to implement laws that made the possession of “hangie-down parts” no longer sufficient criterion for the casting of ballots. With that dubious decision was born the “Literacy Test” — exclusively given to illiterate, uneducated men for the sole purpose of preventing them from voting.

I mention this… why? Well, because this girl has had e-flipping-nuff!  Raise your hand if you agree with the following suggestion:  From this day forward, (only because it can’t be done retroactively…more’s the pity)no American citizen should be permitted to hold any American elected office unless he or she has passed  the test that anyone who wishes to become a citizen of this country is required to pass. 

If the law of the land required that one who cannot pass the current American Citizenship Test, cannot hold any American elected office, this country would have been spared the likes of President George W. “Africa is a nation…” Bush; and Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor “Gazpacho Police” Greene and, of course, (p)Resident Donald “the Moon is part of Mars” Trump. [and if that  sentence were any longer, it would be on Death Row]

could go on. The list of idiotic statements uttered by elected American idiots is, after all, painfully long, (and getting longer by the day), but a girl can only take so much pain and, frankly, Greene’s Gazpacho Nazis have exceeded my daily limit.

Please, I beg of you America, let us ensure that our nation is ruled by sentient beings whose IQ is greater than their waistline, and whose education includes a working knowledge of history, geography, and the difference between right and wrong. Let us, at the very least, be governed by people who find ignorance abhorrent and education laudable.

To quote Captain Jean-Luc Picard, people, can we please just: “Make it so!”

 “Y.Not?!” (aka: Brooke Jones)

WrittenByBrookeJones.com

“She Said WHAT?”!!??

What with everybody running around with their hair on fire over the words that fell out of Karen Johnson’s face on “The View” the other day — Karen Johnson is Whoopi Goldberg’s birth name, by the way –this would be an excellent time for a brief History Lesson. Well, actually, this will be something of a HERstory Lesson. (Take notes. The way things are playing out in this sorry world, it is inevitable that there WILL be a test at some point in the not-too-distant future!)
by

I begin today’s Lesson with the following piece of Reality: Judaism IS a Race – a “Tribal Race”– and one is Jewish if, and only if, one’s Biological mother is Jewish. The “Religious” aspect has to do with the “Belief System” to which those of the Jewish Persuasion tend to adhere. However, unlike Christianity, or Catholicism, or Hinduism, (or dozens of other “Religions”), Judaism is quite literally “rooted” in GENEOLOGY, which is why, while one can adhere to or practice the basic tenents of the Jewish “Religion”, one cannot choose to become Jewish because in order to be Jewish, one must be born the biological off-spring of a Jewish woman, whose mother was the biological off-spring of a Jewish woman, whose mother was also the biological off-spring of…etc, etc, etc. (my condolences to the late, great Sammy Davis, Jr). Of course, this matriarchal lineage dogma rather crumbles if you go back 5,000-plus years, at which point you arrive at an interesting piece of work by the name of Abraham, who is known as “The FATHER of Judaism”…and please do not ask me to explain THAT!

If you are not already sufficiently confused, allow me to include another interesting “factoid“: Abraham is also known as “The Father of Islam“. Why? Well, because before Abe (who, at the time, was a randy 900-plus-years-old) fathered a son named Isaac (the original “good Jewish boy”), he (Abe), ably assisted by Hagar, his (euphemism alert) “maid“, fathered a son he named Ishmael (yes, we shall “call him Ishmael”, Mr. Melville) — a son he and his 900-plus-year-old wife, Sarah (who was the biological mother of Isaac, though NOT the biological mother of Ishmael — don’t get me started) — soon EVICTED (thus giving us the original “Real Housewives of Palestine”)…AND from Ishmael came… Muhammed, and from Muhammed came…”Islam“…making old Abe the father of the world’s two oldest Religions: Judaism and Islam, BOTH of which are rooted in… Genealogy. And thus ends today’s episode of “She said WHAT???”

Shalom and As-Salamu Alaykum.

Y.Not?! (aka: Brooke Jones)

Want more? If you’re “twisted” enough to answer that question in the affirmative, please seek professional help AND visit: https://www.writtenbybrookejones.com

A VISIT FROM SANITY CLAUSE

‘Twas the night before Christmas and in the White House

        not a creature was stirring, except for The Louse.

He sat on his gold throne, device on his knees,

       Tweeting his latest insanities.

Then, from somewhere outside there arose such a clatter,

that he jumped from his duties and dropped his snack platter.

To the window he waddled and looked down to see

a red-suited figure – “Who could that be?”

Then Junior crawled in whining: “What’s all that noise?”

and Barron shrieked:  “Santa! He’s bringing my toys!”

“Oh no, that’s not Santa! Are you dumb or just blind?

That’s old Crooked Hillary and her saggy behind!”

From her sleigh in the driveway then Hillary spoke:

“I’ve got the computers and pictures and notes,

and even the boxes of uncounted votes!

I saw you do all of the sick things you did,

and I know where you’re hiding the secrets you hid.

With the blackmail items that, for years, you’ve stocked up,

when it’s all sorted out, won’t be me who’s locked up!

Your time in the White House will soon be no more

and I’ll laugh and applaud as you’re dragged out the door!”

Then Eric unleashed such a sad, mournful sob:

“If Dad’s not The Boss, who will give me a job?”

“Shut up.  Just shut up!  This is not about YOU!

This is all about ME, but I know what to do!

I’ve got friends, lots of friends, the BEST friends, in fact.

They love me, they’re loyal, they won’t let me get sacked!

I have friends in high places – friends nobody knows,

friends with yuge power and YUGE debts they owe!

I’m too big to fail – too important to touch!

I’ll be President for life – they promised that much!”

Then the pants-suited figure stood tall, straight, and proud

and from out on the driveway her laughter got loud:

“President for life? – Too big to fail?

With titles like that you’ll be well-liked in jail!

With your selfish, disgusting, deplorable deeds,

and your cruelty, lies, and insatiable greed,

you’ve written your future in blood on the streets,

and set it in stone with your 3 AM Tweets!

You’re a cancer – a rancid and festering sore –

a malignant, malicious, international whore!

The time has now come that the Piper be paid.

Time now that the sum of your Evil be weighed.

I thank Flynn, Guiliani, Bolton and Cruz,

and Cohen and all of your ‘Friends’ at Fox News!”

Then, reins in her hands, she hopped back on her sleigh,

and uttered the words she had long wished to say:

“Great thanks to the People who dared ‘take a knee’,

and to Dreamers and Memers who refused not to see,

plus the millions of people with Soul and with Heart

who wept as you tore this whole Nation apart.

Thanks to Mueller, Pelosi, Schiff and Max Waters,

and all of America’s sensible voters,

our Nightmare is over – we’re rid of this Scum

and the soulless bloodsuckers who were loyal to the Bum!”

Then she said, with a wave and a glorious grin:

“Merry Christmas to all – may the Healing begin!”

Y.Not?! (aka Brooke Jones)

Scroll down to see more …AND….to be informed of new offerings in the land of “What If?” please scroll to the bottom and CLICK on the FOLLOW button.

What, Me Worry…?

I wrote this article nearly 18 months ago. It was frightening when I first wrote it…but I find it utterly TERRIFYING today! I’m tempted to describe this article as “URGENT”, but that would be an UNDERstatement! Please READ & SHARE.

WHAT IF...?

I know I’m not
the only child of the “Leave It To Beaver” 1950’s who grew up hearing those
chilling words “You want something to cry
about? I’ll give you something to cry

about!”. Sounds familiar, yes? Well, welcome to the 21st
Century version of that adage: “You want something to worry about? I’ll give you
something to worry about!”.

WHATIF all the fear-mongering, the vitriol – all the hate-laced insanity that spews from every pore of Donald Trump’s bloated being — as ugly, incendiary and terrifying as it has been since he first laid claim to the White House, turns out to be but mild unpleasantness compared to what awaits us when his time in the Oval Office finally, mercifully, ends. (and if that sentence were any longer, it would deserve to be on Death Row). Whenever he exits – whether under his own steam…

View original post 744 more words

The End (of 2020) Is Near

Donald Trump, that putrid pile of festering fecal matter, says America is “rounding the corner” on Covid19.  What he fails to mention is that that “corner” is located at the intersection of Democracy & Doom!

According to the Centers for Disease Control (the CDC):

— On Friday, October 30, 2020, One Hundred Thousand (100,000) new Covid19 cases were diagnosed in the U.S. — 25,000 more than in any previous 24-hour period!

— In the 14-day period ending on Friday, October 30, 2020, One Million (1,000,000) Americans were newly diagnosed with Covid19.

— It took America 10 months to record Eight Million Covid19 cases, BUT only 14 days to record an additional One Million cases!

In other words, what had been a contagion rate of 750,000 new American Covid19 cases per month, has suddenly grown to One Million new American cases in just 14 daysless than half of one month!

At that rate, by New Year’s Eve, Covid19 will have infected an additional Four Million Americans, bringing the number of Americans diagnosed with Covid19 to a staggering 13 Million.

When the total number of Americans diagnosed with Covid19 was only (only?) nine million, the death count was nearly 250,000, or approximately 25,000 deaths per One million cases. If that ratio persists, by the first day of the coming new year, 325,000 Americans will have been killed by the commingling of Covid19 and Donald J. Trump’s criminal negligence and incompetence!

But wait…there’s more:

According to the dictionary, the word paranoia means unjustifiable fear”.  That being the case, one must conclude that those, like myself, who fear for the future health and safety of America and her citizens, are not paranoid, because there is nothing, absolutely nothing UNjustified about that fear!

In the past six months, sales of guns and ammunition have skyrocketed! American homes now contain more guns than pets, and the only thing growing faster than the sale of guns in this country is the girth and rabid hatred of Trump’s Legion of Lunatic Lemmings. 

If you are aware of the Biden/Harris Campaign bus that was attacked in Texas Saturday (10/31/2020) by a caravan of heavily-armed Trumpists…if you read that the number of gun-toting Trumpists involved in that attack greatly outnumbered the combined forces of local law enforcement personnel…if you recall the recent confirmed conspiracy to kidnap and murder the Democratic Governor of the state of Michigan, in retaliation for her efforts to slow the spread of a deadly plague – if these facts are not news to you, and yet you are not convinced that what awaits us on the evening of November 3rd (and in the days and weeks to follow) is anything less than coast-to-coast chaos and bloodshed, then you, dear reader, are dangerously naive.

I insist that it is not paranoia that prompts me to suggest that when Election 2020 is over and the winners have been announced, the first nation-wide noise you will hear will be the sound of hundreds of thousands of guns being locked and loaded by hundreds of thousands of knuckle-dragging Trump worshippers.  What they lack in education and decency they more than compensate for with weapons of mass murder, and a passionate desire to use them!

The old adage “Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst” should now be Thing Number One on your To Do List.  Check your current supplies of food, medicine, vitamins, First Aid provisions, dog and cat food, kitty litter, diapers, coffee, tea, Snickers bars, and yes, toilet paper.  If you have less than several weeks’ worth of any of those items, get to the store and stock up, now!  Fill your fridge and pantry.  Don’t forget batteries, flashlights, and anything else you might need in the immediate future. 

If you have not yet cast your Ballot, and you plan to do so on Election Day, in person at a local Polling Place, get to that Polling Place as early this coming Tuesday morning as possible.  Vote and then go home, and stay home because by late afternoon Tuesday, November 3, 2020, the streets of America will be swarming with heavily-armed Trumpists who will want nothing more than to fire at will (or at Bruce, or Ahmed, or Laticcia, or Sanjay). Itchy trigger fingers are not known for their discernment and anyone who is not ‘them’ will be a perfectly acceptable target.  By word, deed, gesture and implication, Donald Trump has declared it to be Open Season on his enemies, and his long list of enemies includes us.  

And just who is ‘us’? (forgive my syntax slaying. Desperate times call for desperate grammar.) To help you figure out if you could be a target, I’ve compiled a list of characteristics, traits, and tendencies that might earn you a spot on the Trump Enemy List. 

You Might Be A Target Of Trump’s Army of Asshat Assassins If:

  • your Family Tree has more than one branch
  • you have all your teeth
  • you can effortlessly pronounce words of more than two syllables
  • your IQ is at least 20 points higher than your body temperature
  • you own more books than guns
  • you love someone whose personal plumbing resembles your own
  • you wear a Mask whenever you are in public
  • you do not consider “visible butt crack” to be a fashion statement
  • you have a natural, year-round tan
  • English is only one of the languages you speak
  • you do not celebrate Christmas
  • your favorite Family Night movie is not “Deliverance”
  • you do not think of Pork Rinds as Health Food
  • you do not have at least one old car sitting on blocks in your front yard
  • you do not worship Donald John Trump

Take care, all…stay safe…and believe, as I do, that the Pendulum of Life swings back and forth, and, some day soon, sanity, decency, and compassion will rule. 

–Y.Not?! (aka Brooke Jones)

To see more, please scroll down… AND…to be notified of new offerings in the land of “What If?”, scroll to the bottom and CLICK on the FOLLOW button.