'Twas the night before Christmas & all through the manse Donald Senior was farting & soiling his pants He parked his fat fanny on his gold toilet seat, his stained, baggy Boxers adorning his feet. "Melania!" he barked, on his gold intercom "come bring me my phone, I'm in my gold john" "Bite me!" said she, "Do I look like a maid? Call one of your bimbos or some hooker you've laid!"
Then from somewhere close by there came such a loud ruckus that he fell off his throne, landing hard on his tuchus Grabbing his bloomers he went to the door to find red-faced Don Junior out cold on the floor That's when Barron came shouting "That noise was a HOOF! It means Santa just landed his sleigh on our roof!" Then Donald Junior, with a bra on his head crawled into the room & collapsed on the bed.
Suddenly they heard such a terrible BANG that Junior said "Huh?" then passed out again, just as Eric marched in, his gun at his side, "I shot an intruder!" he boasted with pride, as Elon appeared with blood on his face "that fool didn't shoot me, what he shot was this vase!" His hands held one piece of shattered, red glass, while his eyebrows held 2 & there were 3 in his ass.
"I'm sorry!" cried Eric, dropping his gun on the floor, where, of course, it went off, blowing holes in the door, causing Elon to shriek "Whys that dunce own a gun? If he wants to play you should give him a drum!"
"My son is a moron, let's just leave it at that, He's a low-IQ person with the brains of a gnat, but if you sue me you're fired!" Trump threatened Musk, "and I'll have you arrested & in jail by dusk!" "You'll have ME arrested?" Musk said with a smirk "You can't fire ME, you rancid, dumb jerk! Now you work for me, not the other way around, in fact I OWN you & your whole D.C. crowd! And the rest of this country, you orange buffoon, I share with Russia & China & that Saudi loon!"
"You're a nut job, you're crazy!" Trump said in a shout, "but my pal Vlad Putin will straighten you out!" "Your pal Vlad Putin? Don't you know ANYthing? You're just his dumb puppet & he holds your strings!" At the mention of puppets Barron ran in the room "Santa's bringing me puppets & a baby raccoon!" Attempting to stand, Junior said with a shrug "I asked for a doll!" then his face hit the rug.
The sound of a horn was the next noise they heard "Must be Santa's new ride" Don Junior slurred To the window they went, looked out & saw Elon Musk's jet-pack sleigh spitting fire on the lawn Elon hopped in the saddle & strapped himself in, then turned toward the window & said with a grin: "Trump, you love MAGA-LARDO, that's easy to see, but Siberia awaits if you cross Vlad or me! I'll write the laws & I'll make the decrees while you follow my orders & you do as I please!"
Then they heard him proclaim as he flew through the gate, "Merry ChristMUSK to me -- KING ELON THE GREAT!" -- Brooke Jones 12.24.2024 WrittenByBrookeJones.com
WHAT IF...? 